Beyond Words

Dear Human,

I’m so enraged it is difficult to put paw to paper. As you know, I am normally quite eloquent but this situation has rendered me nearly speechless. I do not even know where to begin. Should I start with the blog stealing, the complete lack of attention and respect from my staff, or perhaps the preposterous conclusion that I might not like boxes as much as the little pipsqueak does? AS IF ANYONE COULD LOVE BOXES MORE THAN I DO!

lou magnificent
Do you really need proof?

Excuse me while I hyperventilate into this paper bag…

photo 4 (1)
I will be calm, I will be calm, I will be calm…

Does she not understand that PLVH is a one cat clinic? That I am the only cat who matters here? That I do not deign to keep company with her, boxes or not? DOES SHE REALLY NOT SEE IT?

photo 4 (1)
Calm. I am calm.

And to my traitorous staff – you have stabbed me in the back. I do not know if I can ever forgive you.

virginia
The Virginia state seal expresses my current sentiments perfectly. #EtTuBrute #RevengeIsNigh

You have a lot to make up for, and I’d like to see you try.

Hurt and Betrayed,

Lou

Pandora’s Box

Hello Humans!

My name is Pandora and I’m a 6 week old Domestic Shorthair. Because I was orphaned at only a day old I have been living with the PLVH staff ever since I can remember and it’s been great!

There’s a big white fluffy thing that lives here also. His name is Lou and I’ve been trying to make friends but all he does is hiss and run away. I think he might be shy. However, it’s thanks to him that I heard about this really cool thing called a blog! I’m still working on figuring out computers entirely, but I figured in the meantime Lou won’t mind if I borrow his blog.

meta kitten

A little bit about myself: I was born in a barn here in New Hampshire but I only have vague memories of that because I came to live at PLVH soon after. Here’s a picture of me during snack time when I was only about two weeks old. Don’t judge, I was having a bad hair day.

kitten

I also get a lot of baths while I’m here.

0522151130

Now that I’ve graduated from bottles to regular kitten food I get to have my own cage and toys. They even made special boxes for me! I thought Lou would want to share my boxes, but he seemed rather grumpy about the whole thing. Maybe he doesn’t enjoy boxes as much as I do?

06241520420624152043

Sometimes I get to play on the front desk as well. There are all kinds of strings and toys and funny gadgets there for me to enjoy. I also have a lot of soft, fuzzy toys. Here is a video of me at the front desk so you can see all of the fun things for yourself!

Sometimes Lou sits at the front desk as well, but he doesn’t seem to enjoy the toys as much as I do. He always leaves to go sit in the office when I’m playing with the stapler. He has no idea what he’s missing out on! Maybe I’ll go ask him again if he wants to share my boxes.

Until next time!

Love,

Pandora

Stolen Thunder

Dear Human,

I am displeased to have to alert you to the presence of another feline here at PLVH. She is a 3 week old orphan who… well, you don’t really care about that do you? Because we all know that the only feline who matters here at PLVH is me.

Much to my dismay, the humans have been jumping to attention at her every squawk. Something about how she needs to eat every two hours. Is she really that important?

kitten

No, stop looking at her. Don’t tell me she’s cute. We all know that I am the only magnificent feline here.

lou magnificent
Look at me! LOOK. AT. ME.

She doesn’t seem to have much use and she sleeps a lot.

kitten sleeping

I mean, look at her just lying there doing nothing. At least when I lay around I’m capable of holding many useful things.

lou with stuff
Who needs a kitten when you can have me?

And yet the fact of the matter is that this tiny feline has usurped me and now the question remains: how can I inspire the kind of attentiveness that she has managed to obtain? Is it the fact that she smells like milk and doesn’t know how to use the litter box? Or perhaps I should also cry loudly for feedings every two hours? Maybe I should assume more endearing napping positions? Whatever the solution may be, you can rest assured that I will find it.

2015-02-10_15-12-32_773 (1)
I hope you’re watching this.

Pondering A Solution,

Lou

Let Freedom Ring

Dear Human,

I know that at this point you are no stranger to the trials I have endured here at PLVH. Normally I endure these trails with the good humor and grace that only a feline could possess. However, in light of recent events (like barring me from my favorite napping cabinet) I decided that it was time to provide a reminder of just who is in charge here.

As you know, it has long been my pet peeve that the humans here have been placing my food on top of the xray table despite knowing that I prefer to eat at the ground level. After many months of hard labor I was able to train them to consistently leave my food on the floor where it belongs. That being said, I am well willing to sacrifice my eating preferences for the sake of teaching my humans a lesson.

IMG_1186
I know I’m magnificent

Here I am lounging on top of the xray table while my food remains below. This is not-so-subtle reminder to the humans that I make the rules here, and I am entitled to change the rules as I please.

Luckily, they are easy to re-train.

IMG_1188
#FelineRoyalty

And while using rubber bands to secure the cabinet door may have temporarily kept me at bay, I am a feline, and as a feline I will always prevail.

photo 3
This cabinet belongs to me

Victoriously Yours,

Lou

Injustice At The Office

Dear Human,

As you know, napping is very important to feline happiness. As such, I have created several suitable napping sites for myself around the office. One of the coziest napping places is the cabinet depicted below.

photo

It may not look like much, but you will notice there is a perfectly cat sized space on the upper shelf. Additionally, the boxes on the bottom shelf are filled with soft bandaging material, which makes for the perfect resting place. And of course, it doesn’t hurt that closing the cabinet door provides me with restful darkness and some much needed privacy.

However, today a grave injustice occurred and I was barred access to my favorite napping cabinet.

photo 1

Something about keeping the bandage material clean for patients. As if that matters. I am the first priority here!!

I have included video evidence as proof of my plight. I will of course be planning suitable revenge.

Woundedly Yours,

Lou

Dare I Hope?

Dear Human,

After 6 months of endless winter I was beginning to think spring would never come. Even just last week the lake was still partially frozen.

lake
Seriously? It’s April.

However, the past few days have been reasonably warm and I can finally see the grass again. At this point I’d almost forgotten what it’s like to feel the warmth of the sun on my fur and to be able to meander outside without my poor wet paws freezing.

loubasking
Why yes, I do look fabulous. Thanks for noticing.

The return of warm weather means plotting about complete clinic takeover without listening ears relaxation and hunting field mice.

photo 4 (12)
Totally innocent

As much as I love basking in the sunlight, rolling in the dirt and chasing bugs, I must admit that sometimes the outdoors get a little lonely.

photo 1 (12)
On the outside looking in

As a feline I do, after all, require a certain amount of attention. Luckily, everyone at PLVH is here to cater to my needs.

loucuddles
#Winning

Hoping spring is here to stay,

Lou

 

Rage And Rations

Dear Human,

As you know, it can at times be difficult to get a decent meal around here and between the dieting and the forced exercise I often find myself at my wit’s end. To make matters worse, I now have to compete for food with the dog (if you haven’t yet met Oscar, click here). I keep telling the clinic staff they need to rein in the little hellion, but my pleas continue to fall on deaf ears. “But Lou,” they tell me, “We put your food on top of the xray table. It’s for your own safety! Oscar can’t get your food on top of the xray table.”

Lies, I tell you, it’s all lies.

I’d like to present the following evidence in hopes that at least someone out there will believe the severity of my plight.

Exhibit A: text messages exchanged between myself and the canine culprit.

dog eats food

Exhibit B: he steals cookies, he steals toys, and you think he’s not capable of stealing my food?! Dear Human, get it together.

Exhibit C: this has nothing to do with the dog, but is an indication of the general torture one can expect to receive here.

lousaddle
#DearHuman #RevengeIsComing

On a completely unrelated note, is anyone looking to adopt a wonderful little Dachshund?

Exasperatedly yours,

Lou

Shopping For Supplies

Dear Human,

We’ve reached the middle of the week and supplies are running low here at PLVH. Thankfully, one of my lovely servants coworkers has begun a grocery list.

1216141027
That’s how we roll here at PLVH

I’d like to take this opportunity to talk to you about the types of things that constitute as necessary supplies here at a vet clinic. Of course you have the usual things like bandage material, suture scissors and vaccines, but that’s not all that goes into running a great practice. You also have to keep your inhabitants happy, which requires supplies like beds, blankets, and fluffy pillows.

2015-02-10_15-12-32_773 (1)
A comfortable patient is a happy patient. Toys are also a must.

Staying warm is also a concern during these cold winter months.

IMG_1113
#endthewinter

I know, I know – things here at PLVH are pretty awesome and you wish you were me. But that’s enough talk; it’s time to go make all those necessities a reality. I’m ready, who’s with me?!

IMG_1126
Whoever said money can’t buy happiness never went shopping for catnip.

Cosy As Ever,

Lou