No Time For Games

Dear Human,

As you know, felines are expected to maintain a certain level of decorum.

Lou Navy
Case in point.

However, sometimes that’s hard to do around here. I like to abide by certain rules. For example, I do not partake in activities that make me look foolish. I do not exercise more than is strictly required. I do not lower myself to the level of playing games with the dog.

I try to make myself clear on all of these points, I really do.

playing tag

However, some individuals (I won’t use any names) just can’t take a hint.

What’s a cat got to do around here to get some peace?!

lou magnificent
I need every day in my life to be like this.

Missing My Zen,


PS When I said I wouldn’t use names I never promised not to use any photo evidence.

Rage And Rations

Dear Human,

As you know, it can at times be difficult to get a decent meal around here and between the dieting and the forced exercise I often find myself at my wit’s end. To make matters worse, I now have to compete for food with the dog (if you haven’t yet met Oscar, click here). I keep telling the clinic staff they need to rein in the little hellion, but my pleas continue to fall on deaf ears. “But Lou,” they tell me, “We put your food on top of the xray table. It’s for your own safety! Oscar can’t get your food on top of the xray table.”

Lies, I tell you, it’s all lies.

I’d like to present the following evidence in hopes that at least someone out there will believe the severity of my plight.

Exhibit A: text messages exchanged between myself and the canine culprit.

dog eats food

Exhibit B: he steals cookies, he steals toys, and you think he’s not capable of stealing my food?! Dear Human, get it together.

Exhibit C: this has nothing to do with the dog, but is an indication of the general torture one can expect to receive here.

#DearHuman #RevengeIsComing

On a completely unrelated note, is anyone looking to adopt a wonderful little Dachshund?

Exasperatedly yours,


Meet Oscar

Dear Human,

I have new reports on the trials and tribulations I am facing┬áhere at PLVH. Today I’d like to introduce you to Oscar. Oscar is a young adult dachshund who may look cute but is 12 pounds of pure terror. He eats my food, he steals my toys, and all he wants to do is play games. Despite my repeated training regarding my personal space bubble, Oscar insists on trying to engage me in activities like chase, tag, keep away, and other such horrors. He also seems to have no qualms about all that fluffy white stuff, which in and of itself is suspicious.


Below I have included video evidence with which I hope to make you aware of my plight. Please send reinforcements.